It’s January, which means everywhere you look we are being bombarded. Bombarded by suggestions of “new year, new you” or “here’s 50% off”. It irritates the hell out of me that products which were full price just a few weeks ago are suddenly discounted because the calendar changed.
We are heavily marketed to have new goals, new habits, a new body, new products, or a new morning routine that starts at 5am.
Now this might surprise you.
As a coach, I’m not a big advocate of New Year’s resolutions. Not because goals are bad. I LOVE goals. But because I don’t believe goals should be set under pressure or with any kind of undertone of “fixing yourself”.
We’re still in the depths of winter. The days are short, the light is low, and nature is sleeping. Trees aren’t setting intentions. Bears aren’t joining gyms. Everything is resting, conserving energy, and quietly preparing for a time that hasn’t arrived yet.
Yet we expect ourselves to do the opposite. Thanks, capitalism.
In a world shaped by over-consumerism, January has become a strange springboard for self-improvement. The message is subtle but relentless: you are not enough as you are, and now would be an excellent time to fix that. Buy the planner. Download the app. Commit harder. Try again. Do more.
For many people, especially those who are already conscientious, self-aware, and trying their best, New Year’s resolutions don’t inspire change. They create pressure. And pressure, especially in winter, has a habit of turning into guilt by February.
So, what if January wasn’t about becoming better?
What if it was about becoming kinder?
What if instead of asking “What should I do more of?” we asked:
- What do I need less of right now?
- What am I consuming that’s leaving me depleted?
- What expectations could I soften?
Real goals, the ones that actually stick, tend to emerge gradually. They show up when motivation is naturally higher and when ideas form organically, not when society tells us it’s time to reinvent ourselves. They reveal themselves throughout the year in moments of friction, curiosity, or quiet dissatisfaction. They evolve as your life evolves. If they are born out of January pressure you have to question what is motivating you.
Winter asks for something different. Slower mornings. Warmer food. Lower expectations. More rest. Less self-surveillance. Fewer declarations and more listening.
Mental health often improves not when we add another goal, but when we remove a layer of strain.
So, if you feel resistant to setting resolutions this year, that might not be laziness or lack of ambition. It might be wisdom. It might be your nervous system saying, not yet.
What if you allowed yourself to just be, allowed yourself to rest, recalibrate, and opt out of the collective rush to reinvent yourself. Staying steady through winter is not falling behind.
It’s exactly what nature intended.
